College is a whirlwind, especially if you’re in a long distance relationship. Being miles away from your partner can be tough, but don’t worry—it can be a rewarding experience that builds both trust and love. Over the last (almost) two years, I’ve gathered some of the best tips to make the distance feel smaller and to keep the spark aflame, even if you’re on opposite ends of the country (or world!). Here are my favorite LDR survival tips, from one college student to another.
1. Make Technology Your Best Friend
In a long distance relationship, technology is your lifeline. It is very important to try to call every day, even if it’s just for a couple of minutes. Also, it’s super helpful if you are able to get into a calling routine, such as between certain classes and before bed.
You don’t need to be in constant contact all day, but having some sort of connection through texting, calling, and Facetiming is crucial! Some days will be busier than others, but making time to actually talk at least a few times a week will help you and your partner stay connected.
Some other ways that technology is useful in a LDR is virtual dates (discussed more in #6), playing online games, and having a calendar countdown to your next visit.
2. Send Old-Fashioned Mail
Most people would agree that finding a card or package in the mail is an exciting feeling, especially if it’s a surprise. This is a great way to show you value your long distance partner through gifts or words. Sending mail doesn’t need to be expensive, a simple love letter could make your partner’s week.
If you are looking to do something a bit more extravagant, sending a care package full of thoughtful goodies, ordering flowers to your partner’s door, or shipping a present they’ve been wanting for a while are all ways to demonstrate your love.
These gestures will make your partner feel special and give them a little piece of you to hold onto until you’re together again.
3. Embrace the Independence
Being in college means it’s time to see new places, spend time with friends, and build your future, and being in a long distance relationship doesn’t mean you have to ignore that aspect of your life. Embrace your independence! This is a chance to grow individually while being committed to your person.
It is very important to invest time in hobbies, friendships, and academic goals. If you and your partner are both in college, you can probably relate and share your day to day activities with each other. Even if only one of you is in college, having all of these adventures can make for good stories to tell!
The friends that you make in college will likely be your friends for life. While balancing “me time”, calling your partner, and spending time with friends can be challenging, make sure you don’t let yourself put your friends on the back burner. It is likely that you will have other friends who experience or have experienced long distance, so leaning on them for community and support will also make the distance easier.
4. Plan Visits to Look Forward To
One of my biggest pieces of advice to people in similar situations as me is to always know when you’re going to see each other next, even if it’s a few months away and not officially booked yet. This is a great way to see an ending to the distance and have something to look forward to.
Planning these visits together is also a great way to bond. You can plan fun things to do, which helps visiting each other feel like a vacation. If you’re both in college in different places you explore each other’s cities and campus for new and lasting memories.
5. Communicate! Communicate! Communicate!
This is essential in any relationship, but it’s especially crucial in a long distance one. The key to surviving long distance is to talk openly, honestly, and often with each other. Share your joys, your worries, your small day-to-day details, and your big dreams.
Telling each other random things about your day will build your connection as a couple and might even give you some inside jokes. Good communication will build trust and strengthen your relationship, even when you’re miles apart.
6. Schedule Regular Virtual Dates
In any relationship, it’s vital to go on regular dates. While it’s not possible for long distance couples to do this in a conventional way, finding ways to have little virtual dates is a great alternative.
You can watch shows or movies on Facetime together, cook the same meal and eat it on the phone, play virtual games, or anything else that you both enjoy. I know there aren’t a ton of options, which is why my goal is to make DistanceDates a platform that offers more!
7. Avoid Comparing Your Relationship to Others
Every couple has a unique dynamic, so try not to compare your relationship to others. Whether it be to your friends or on social media, this is unfortunately something many people fall into. However, you never know someone’s full picture and many people dream of having the love you and your partner share.
Trust your instincts and stay true to what feels right for you and your partner. Through long distance, you’re building a strong foundation of trust and communication, which is an incredible skill for any relationship. Stay positive and confident in your choice.
8. Focus on the Bigger Picture
Long distance relationships can be challenging, but remember that you’re working towards a future together. Focus on the bigger picture of the situation. Each day you get through brings you one day closer to the next time you see them and to the time when the distance is finally closed.
Remember that if it’s meant to be it will work out! Every couple’s relationship is special in its own way, so make sure to remind your partner that they are worth the distance!
XOXO,
Gianna
