While the main focus of DistanceDates is long distance romantic relationships, we recognize that long distance friendships are also very prevalent for many, and require some maintenance as well. Most people will experience these at some point in their lives because some of our friends will move away for college, get jobs in different cities, meet friends on vacation, and whatever other circumstances separate you and your friends.
Aside from having a long distance boyfriend, I have multiple long distance friends, whether I’m at school and away from my home friends, or at home away from my school friends. I still feel close to my best friends even if we don’t talk every day and see each other every three months, so let’s talk about some ways to navigate and nurture your relationships with your BFFs, no matter how far apart you are! (These also work with long distance family members!!)
1. Prioritize Communication
Like long distance relationships, communication is the lifeline of long distance friendships, keeping connections alive despite miles of separation. In these relationships, you can’t rely on spontaneous coffee dates or random encounters to stay close, but both spontaneous and meaningful conversations can keep the connection and make it feel like no time has passed.
All friendships have different dynamics; you might call one friend everyday, but text another once every two weeks, because that is what works best for you both. As long as you’re both putting in some sort of effort to keep each other in the loop, your friendship should be more than lasting.
One type of communication that I would recommend to long distance besties, especially if you’re really busy, is to send videos or audio messages updating each other about your lives. This is a great way to be more personal and hear your friend’s voice, even if you don’t have time to call often.
2. Be Present When You Talk
Being present when you talk is essential, especially in long distance friendships where every conversation matters. It’s easy to get distracted by notifications or multitasking, but true connection happens when you give someone your full attention. Active listening shows that you value their thoughts and feelings, which is an important quality in any type of relationship.
This presence strengthens your friendship and helps your friend feel seen and appreciated. On the other hand, divided attention can lead to misunderstandings or make your friend feel undervalued.
Whether it’s a quick text or a long call, being present creates quality moments that make your time together meaningful, keeping your bond strong and genuine even through the distance.
3. The Little Things Matter (yes, even with your friends & family!)
Sometimes, it’s the little things that make the biggest impact. Small acts of kindness can brighten your friend’s day and remind them of how important they are to you. Maybe you decide to be pen pals and send handwritten notes, or ship a random care package with items they’ll love, these are thoughtful ways to show you care.
Celebrating their milestones, like birthdays, promotions, or personal victories, is equally important. Even if it’s as simple as a heartfelt message, it will probably make your friend’s week.
Sharing pieces of your life keeps the connection alive too—take a photo of something that reminds you of them, send a song you think they’d love, or suggest a book you can both enjoy and discuss. These small gestures make the distance a little bit easier.
4. Keep Making Fun Plans
Making fun plans to look forward to is another great way to strengthen long distance friendships. Having something exciting on the horizon keeps the bond alive and gives both of you a shared goal to anticipate. Whether it’s planning a trip together, organizing a virtual movie night (DistanceDates can be used for long distance friendships too!), or scheduling a time to hangout the next time you’re both in the same city, these plans create moments of joy and connection.
Discussing the details—where you’ll go, what you’ll do, or even what snacks to prepare—builds excitement. Fun plans also give you something to lean on during tougher times and give you both something to look forward to. Even simple ideas, like creating a bucket list for your next visit, can keep your friendship just as special as before!
5. Understand That Dynamics May Change
Friendships naturally evolve over time, and long distance ones are no different. As you each grow and navigate life separately, your relationship may change, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing. Embrace these shifts as opportunities to strengthen your bond, and stick together through thick and thin.
This is especially likely to happen if you’re moving away to college or going through some other type of big change. Just remember that true friendships will withstand any distance, even if it’s a little bit different.
Focus on quality over quantity when it comes to communication. Even if you don’t talk as often, meaningful conversations and shared understanding matter more than constant contact.
Change is a sign of adaptability and resilience—it shows that your connection can stay strong life’s transitions. By staying supportive and open to these changes, your friendship can deepen, proving that distance and time only add layers to a strong and lasting bond.
Long distance friendships are so special because they are proof that you don’t need to live in the same place to be close to the people you love.
Similar to LDRs, the miles might make things harder, they also make the bond stronger. Whether it’s through meaningful phone calls, thoughtful care packages, or looking forward to plans the next time you see each other, every effort you make is important in keeping your friendship alive!
Remember that true friendship means having each other’s backs through the highest highs and the lowest lows, and this is still possible even if you live in different places!
What are some of your favorite ways to stay connected with long distance friends? Share your tips and experiences in the comments below or on our social media!
